The last few weeks have seen me recovering from an operation. It's given me the opportunity to do a lot more of listening and observing of Sonny. Here's what I've noticed about this nervous dog. Training: will do the 'sit, stay' stuff no problem, but his mind is always anxious and active. Opening the back door to the garden illustrates this beautifully. Under a normal regime I would get the dogs to sit and wait before I let them out, but once released Sonny would still bomb out at a rate of knots at which Holly, my other smaller and more confident dog, would be chasing and barking at him to tell him to calm it down. Not only is it not a good idea for any dog to be rushing out of a door for safety reasons but, particularly for Sonny dog, who seems to be developing a wobbly back end, this sudden spurt of movement seems to make him wobble even more so I am worried he could fall and really hurt himself.
So, here's what I've been trying:
1. Open door
2. WAIT and breath in a relaxed and calm way (that's me not the dogs)
3. Holly the confident gets it quickly and lies down
4. Sonny, always anxious and worried when the door is open takes much longer to get it, so I stand and I BREATHE and I look at the birds and I think about anything, eg my shopping list for tomorrow. I don't focus on him as this can get me anxious for him to hurry up to calm down. If he's standing I don't tell him to sit, he needs to work this out on his own. You can see him thinking it through. What does she want from me? EVENTUALLY he sits and looks at me, at this point I say nothing but release Holly who is lying down in a relaxed manner. I look at Sonny's expression, does he have paw raised, a wrinkled brow or is he shaking? all signs that his mind has not relaxed yet. If any of these signs are still present I wait longer. The close observation of your dog's body language and demeanour gives lots of subtle signals as to where his mind is.
5. CALM SUBMISSION achieved (soft eyes and ears, relaxed body posture), he is allowed to walk out with me, CALMLY. Now you see the difference in him, instead of bolting out, he trots gently and sniffs. As a result Holly, who is already outside (she was rewarded for sitting and relaxing first) has no need to correct him so there is no frantic barking or chasing from her. Everything is much calmer and the dogs are displaying no behaviour that is likely to annoy the neighbours.
How long does this process all take? I haven't timed it yet but I think it is only a matter of minutes. What is clear to me know is that if you are in any kind of a hurry or, feel impatient with a 'why don't you hurry up' thought in your head your dog will instantly pick up on it. So with Sonny dog this all leads to a reinforcement of his anxious mind which is not good.
What is this dog teaching me? PATIENCE, calmness. This is what he understands, he speaks dog, he does not achieve a relaxed response with anything verbal. Training? Sure, he'll sit and stay because he's a bright boy but his mind set has not changed at all. You have to wait longer for that.
I am learning a lot by just by staying quiet and being around my dog, watching and being with him. I notice that when he is anxious I feel anxious to, we mirror eachother. Who knows where it begins. He has been brought to me to help me deal with that part of myself, of that I am convinced. When you communicate with your dog using his language, it works and you get that 'Aha!' moment, it really is a magical process!
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